Never sorry that I celebrate Christmas

I just saw others posting about whether or not people should (again) wish others a Merry Christmas. I think I promised myself time and again that this thing would never bother me anymore, but I continually break my promise. :) At least the debate forces me to have a yearly meditation about what it means to identify as a person who celebrates Christmas.

I remember being in a graduate class of thirty people where I was the only person who celebrate Christmas. None of my classmates came up to me and said Merry Christmas. Even to this day, some of my close relatives would not say Merry Christmas to me and my family. I thought that staying in the US will change the elusiveness of Christmas wishes, but some people I know in academia deliberately refuse to say Merry Christmas. They know I do celebrate Christmas, but the term Christmas itself has a connotation of a majority religion that is too exclusionary and refuses to acknowledge other religious or spiritual holidays happening around the same time (for instance Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Yule, St. Nicholas Day), so they choose to say Happy Holiday(s) instead.

When I think about it, I learn several things from my yearly frown, meditation, disappointment (and maybe grudge too).

First, as a person who celebrates Christmas and as part of Indonesian religious minorities, I have an awareness about how my religious holiday is partly determined by whether or not others acknowledge or refuse to acknowledge my belief. Some may say, you think too much! But of course I think too much. I think about scholars who say that people move in, about, and around sets of privileges and oppression. I think about why it is difficult and threatening for some people to acknowledge that a religious holiday named Christmas exists, and that some people celebrate it. However, I think about how in other settings, my position as a "majority," my views and choices that reflect this position may render others feeling left out and marginalized. I think about my position as a person privileged to be educated in the US, as a Christian, a first-born, older sibling to my sister and brother, as a person who speaks English and has the means to learn other languages, as a heterosexual, as a Teaching Assistant who will teach three classes of undergraduates. I think about others' privileges as white people, men, of upper socioeconomic class, etc. The difficulty of moving in these sets of privileges and oppression makes me appreciate people who are genuinely willing to talk about the issue of giving a Christmas wish (but also other things), about the diversity and difficulty of approaching the issue, and are trying to imagine that if we disagree on this issue, how we can agree on larger issues like protection to people who have different beliefs or law enforcement for people who use violence against certain religious communities.

Second, the "marginalized" feeling makes me think my voice matters, that everyone has a story to tell. It makes me think how I should not feel sorry for celebrating Christmas, but instead be able to think and express why Christmas matters to me. The "marginalized" feeling has made me think what kind of scholarship I choose to do, what kinds of activism I choose to support, and how, despite differences, I can work with people who have different views to deal with issues like violence, poverty, and lack of access to education.

Third, the debate about Christmas wishes makes me think of words that I know are important to me and for others to hear, but often days flow by without me saying them, or days flow by with me deliberately withhold them. Words like "I love you," "Please forgive me," "I forgive you," "You are special," or even "Happy Birthday!" (oh how I am guilty of this one). I as a person, and we as a community, often hold on to rigid walls, selfish ambition, self-centered forgetfulness that refuse to acknowledge how people, love, and relationships may be some of the most important things in life.

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*Debates about wishing others a Merry Christmas can be read here:
http://www.tempo.co/read/news/2012/12/20/078449400
http://www.tempo.co/read/news/2012/12/20/173449329/MUI-Umat-Islam-Tidak-Usah-Ucapkan-Selamat-Natal
http://www.ikhwanweb.com/article.php?id=18905